A recent poll of football fans has revealed that goats are in fact not the greatest animal of all time. And they’re not even in the top ten!
Lions (2nd), tigers (3rd) and leopards (4th) all ranked higher than goats, despite themselves being quite keen on a bit of goat.
Meanwhile, all-time greatest creature, the T-Rex, issued a warning to any goats associated with high-performing footballers:
“I eat little bleaters like you for breakfast. We should call Pele, Messi, Ronaldo or whoever the T-Rex, not the G.O.A.T.”
“I’ve been retired for 65 million years and I’m still the greatest. And about that, it took a 10-million megaton comet to stop me, not a barbed wire fence or a nice curry recipe!”
Spokesgoat for the Herbivore Excellence Recognition Department (HERD), Little Billy Gruff, hit back at the ranking:
“Bah! What a load of nonsense! We don’t even like football. If we did, Bruno Fernandes would be our favourite player – I mean, he eats grass and bleats almost as much as us. And I suppose we quite like Zidane for his headbutt on Materazzi, but that’s about it.
“Anyway, you’re just trolls. Butt out, or I’ll get my big brother!”